Life Lessons on Ladybugs

Toby was sitting at the counter this afternoon having his snack while I was making dinner when all of a sudden he spied a lady bug on the ground. He quickly got down and started to play with it excitedly. I wasn't pay much attention because I was busy creating kid friendly supper food (NO EASY FEAT!) when he climbed back up on his stool and announced matter-of-factly, “Well THAT lady bug isn’t going to fly again!” and returned to his snack. He then finished it up with, “Yup. He’s gone and got DEAD, that ladybug.” And took a deep satisfied gulp of his juice.

Well THAT got my attention. I know EXACTLY what it means when kids develop a love of torturing animals and this was NOT a behaviour I had either anticipated or would tolerate. But I gave my son the benefit of the doubt by gingerly asking how this lady bug had “gotten” dead.

“OH.” He said coldly, “I did it to him.”

Rob took one look at my panic-stricken face and reassured me that he IS only 3.

I wasn’t reassured.

I raced over to where the poor ladybug lay on the floor and examined him.

“Oh, DEAR, Toby!” I tried to enlist his empathy, “The POOR LADYBUG!”

Toby put his juice down to come over and look. When he was down on the floor with me and making eye contact I asked him very seriously why he had hurt the ladybug.

Apparently it was a BAD ladybug because it had not wanted to get up on Toby’s finger. So it got squished.

I had hoped to garner SOME emotion from Toby as I taught him that it’s not nice to hurt ANYTHING – animal, insect or person – no matter what they’ve done to you. (Including something as appalling as refusing to get on your finger…) I used an example of how he felt when he got hurt. I think he understood, but I was a little disappointed that I hadn’t elicited even a remorseful LOOK from the boy.

My skepticism was further reinforced when he got back up on his chair and promptly burst into tears because he had spilled his orange juice on his new pirate placemat. (Aha! So you DO have feelings...)

But not to worry - - a few minutes later the miracle of Easter occurred on our kitchen floor and that very same ladybug was seen scurrying across the floor again. I pointed this out to Toby excitedly and he very calmly got down onto the floor to inspect the resurrection.

I am relieved to report that my life lesson from the floor of the kitchen DID in fact take; as he watched the Jesus Christ of Ladybugs frantically scurry away from him I overheard him whisper, “Don’t worry, Ladybug. This time I’m not going to squish you.”

I think we’re making progress.