True Professions of Love

When Toby started stringing 2 word sentences together it wasn’t long before he melted our hearts with “I wuv oooo” in our arms each night at bedtime.  It has got to be, hands down, one of the most euphoricaly-drug-simulating moments that parenthood gives you.

And once again, we fall victim to sibling-assumptions.

Mia, who has been stringing 2 or 3 words together for months now, absolutely REFUSES to indulge our parental cheesiness.  Each night when I put her down to sleep I say, “night night, Mia, I love you!” to which she replies with an offhanded wave of her hand and a gruff, “BYE BYE.” 

Rob has even started practicing with her, “Mia- - I LOOOVE YOU!!” he’ll say in his most endearing voice only to be met with her dead pan stare and the now humorously predictable, “BYE BYE.”  Apparently she thinks this is the logical response to someone’s confession of love.

But this weekend I finally duped her.

Mia has a very busy social life.  She attends dance classes, swim lessons, gym, music, rhythm and rhymes at the Early Years center, the gymnastics club at the YMCA…I really cannot keep up with her busy weekly schedule.  Somewhere, during ONE of these groups, she heard the song Skinnamarink – you know the one – that ends each verse with a heartfelt “I LOVE YOU!!!!”

Shelly informed me of her new obsession with this song and the bait was on the hook.  By the end of the weekend she was humming the tune and eventually I actually heard, for the first time ever, those 3 sweet words come out of her mouth.

“I love BUUUU!”  She said with so much genuine love I felt instantaneously jealous for the recipient of her very first pronouncement of love:  her beloved blanket.

She still says BYE BYE as I kiss her lovingly good night and tell her how much I love her each night, but I now KNOW that she can say it and one day, when she realizes that I’m JUST as great as her beloved blanket, I’m going to hear it for real.

…I’ll keep you posted.  Until then - -BYE BYE.

I will conclude this post with a video of something Mia DOES share willingly: The singing of Happy Birthday with the delivery of a Lego Tower Birthday Cake.  It seems to be her newfound obsession.  As you will be able to tell from this short clip, she is missing 66% of the words to the song but the message gets across crystal clear.

Minor Construction Mishaps...

I am under strict instructions from my uber-supportive-texting-friend that I need to post a summary of what took place yesterday at the YMCA.

In fact, I will paraphrase for you her 2 word response to my text of woe: “Blog it.”

The YMCA is under construction.  Ordinarily this sort of thing doesn’t affect my day to day life but this weekend I dropped by for a last minute treadmill run and let me just say…I blame what unfolded that morning ENTIRELY on the construction. 

I was feeling so proud of myself for actually ATTENDING the gym on a WEEKEND that my post-workout gait was slightly quicker and more spry than usual.

So peppy and confident was I, in fact, that I decided to check my email on my phone as I confidently strode into the change room to shower.

SO carefree was I post workout that I didn’t even look UP from my phone until I found myself unexpectedly in the shower room amid several running showers.

And multiple naked, HAIRY asses.

I did the only logical thing to do under this scenario: I froze.

And then I bolted at top speed out of the men’s change room.

“Did anyone notice?”  My friend texted back (after a several preceding LOL and BAHAHAHAH texts).

The truth is I don’t know.  I suspect I made a fairly discreet and quiet entrance but I undoubtedly blew my cover on my frenetic exit.  I can’t say for sure whether I screamed or not, but I definitely tripped over at least ONE bench and sent my entire body SLAMMING into the exit door (which turns out to be a PULL, not a PUSH door) for my Grande finale.

It goes without saying that this weekend I think I’ll skip the gym.

Kindergarten Update!

Thank you all for your kind emails, comments, phone calls and for humoring me in my moments of mommy-weakness.  I am happy to report that today came and went without a hitch.  Toby woke up in great spirits and his excitement about kindergarten proved to be contagious.  We laughed and chatted all the way in to town and it wasn’t until about a block before school that he announced rather suddenly that his “tummy felt weird.”  I reassured him that mine did, too.

Drop off was fine.  He rallied his shyness and eventually mustered up the courage to come out from behind my legs and was sitting by the window with some of the bigger SK boys when I left.   He even casually shrugged off my eager suggestion that we wave to one another as I walked past his kindergarten window on my way back to the car.  I could tell he was going to be just fine.

Before I knew it, 3pm was upon us and I was able to come and pick him up.  I was SO eager to hear about his day. 

My anxieties have quickly dissipated and I have entered the realm of bemused investigative work.  Deciphering what ACTUALLY went down today has been an exercise in creative questioning and patience.  Rob and I have spent the evening working on it and this is what we have thus far : 

-       He has 3 teachers.  Two of them are called “Mrs. Shields”.  The other one is called The French Teacher.

-       He does not have French classes.  This lady does not teach them French, nor does she speak French.  She accompanied their class to the gym to play duck duck goose and the reason he calls her The French Teacher is that is what the other kids call her.

-       He didn’t get a turn at duck duck goose; each time someone went around he was called a Duck.
      He has a "medium" number of kids in his class.  More specifically, he has "between zero and nine" kids in the class.

-       One kid cried.  One kid got hurt and had a bleeding elbow.
      He didn't sing any songs or read any books. They did SUGGEST he participate in Arts and Crafts but he refused so someone traced his hands on the board for him.  (Probably "Mrs Shields"...)

-       At Kindergarten they call Circle time “Science Centre”.  I was corrected about 5 times tonight after mistakenly referring to circle time by its former name.

-       They start “science center” every morning by putting their hands together, saying something, and then saying “Amen”.   They pronounce it “Ah-men” not “Hah-men” like they do at church.
      He didn't go to the bathroom at all today.

-       He had two breaks for lunch.  During the first one he ate his sandwich and during the second one he ate his apple.  What he REALLY wanted to eat was his applesauce but he couldn’t find his spoon.  No, Mrs Shields was not there to help him find it because someone's Grandma was in charge of the class during the lunch times.  (He didn't remember her name).  When I emptied his lunch bag he had all his desserts sitting there untouched (INCLUDING his Cars gummies!) with his spoon sitting on top and no sign of his applesauce.  Another mystery...

-

That’s the update from our end!  I promise not to report any further drama until at least Monday when he has to start taking the bus on his own.  Until then, have a great weekend! 

Someone's got the Pre-Kindergarten Jitters!

Alas, the day we have long been waiting for, dreading, and over-discussing is finally upon us: tomorrow morning, I send my baby boy off to kindergarten.

I’m a practical person.  I know when it is reasonable and when it is not reasonable to be anxious about things.  I know the difference between a REAL problem and what is just a PERCEIVED problem.

And then I had children.

My emotional instability on the last day of Toby’s daycare took me by surprise, but I had ALWAYS thought that I would greet the first day of Kindergarten with a LOT more rationality and a lot LESS emotion than most other parents.   Once again, I prove myself wrong.

Here’s what I DON’T have to worry about:

Toby is fully potty trained

Here’s what I have been losing sleep over for the past few weeks:

Who his teacher is and what he/she will be like

How he is going to get his lunch bag opened

How he is going to handle the 1.5-hour bus ride home (!!!)

How he is going to do at drop off that first day

How I am going to do at drop off that first day

Whether he is going to make any friends

Whether he is going to make too many friends and not listen to the teacher

Whether he is going to eat his Cars Gummy Treats before any of the healthy stuff I’ve packed for him

How tired and cranky he is going to be after a full day of learning

Whether I can ever do anything fun with him ever again on a weekday…

The list goes on.

Toby, on the other hand, has no IDEA how significant an event this is.   He has not asked a single question and his only concern is whether or not he’s going to remember all of the “rules on the bus”. Yesterday, after offhandedly announcing that he only had ONE MORE SLEEP until Kindergarten I asked him how he felt about it.

“Oh, fine” he said as if I’d asked him if he’d rather have spaghetti or pizza for dinner.

I probed a little deeper,

“How does GOCHAR feel about school, Toby?  Is Gochar excited too or is he a bit nervous?”

Toby thought about this for a while as he pensively chewed his raisin bran.

After a few moments he shook his head conclusively, “No, Gochar isn’t nervous. He’s just excited.”

So I’m all-alone here on the nervous-bus on the night before kindergarten.  But I have reached the stage of acceptance.  I know tomorrow is inevitable; I have to just let whatever happens come my way.  Maybe this time tomorrow night I will have a lot less to worry about at night?  Hopefully???!

Tonight, as I snuggled my little boy to sleep he asked me to read him the Dr Seuss book “Oh the Places You Will GO”.  I hadn’t read this book since a family friend gave it to me after getting accepted to medical school.  It is TRULY ironic that he asked me to read it to him tonight.

As I read it I had one of those clairvoyant moments as parents.  Those moments in time you consciously watch yourself live through knowing full well you will think back upon them for years and years to come.  Moments you cherish so much they almost make you cry as they unfold before you.

The book is, perhaps, more suitable to a grade 8 student or a high school graduate, but as I read it to him tonight I realized that this is likely the last time I will be able to lie in bed with him and snuggle him to sleep the night before such a big event.  (I HIGHLY doubt that the 18-year-old version of Toby will let me lie with him and play with his hair while I read him “Oh the Places You will Go” before his first day of University.)

And so I poured my heart into it and read it to him, and to myself, and to every future version of Toby as he faces life’s biggest moments.

Toby:

  One day you may come upon this blog and read it, and it may be the only way you will know what I said to you the night before I let you out into the real world of school, and bullies, and lunch boxes, and school bus rides.  It may have come from Dr Seuss but it also came from my heart.

“Congratulations!  Today is your day.  You’re off to Great Places!  You’re off and away!  And will you succeed?  Yes, yes you will 98 and ¾ percent guaranteed.  Kid, you’ll move mountains!  Today is your day.  Your mountain is waiting…so…get on your way.”

Sometimes letting your children go is the hardest thing we have to do as parents.  But, as I will likely realize over the next few weeks, it is also one of the most important.

Good luck tomorrow to all of Toby’s 4-year-old friends and buddies…and all you parents, too!  I send you off tomorrow with pride, love and hope, Toby-Bear.  Go move mountains…

Mia's Newest Antic

Some of Mia’s antics are so cute and endearing that I want to freeze time so she never outgrows them.  Others, not so much…

Her latest demand developed a week or so ago when she had a bad diaper rash.  On a few occasions when I changed her diaper, I would blow on her bum to air dry her out before putting some cream and a new diaper on. 

I had forgotten about this little “thing” I had so innocently done until yesterday when I went to change her (now not so diaper-rashed bum) and skipped the gentle airing out part.  Mia, on the other hand, did NOT forget about it and let me know as only Mia could.

“BLOW!” she instructed insistently, pulling her feet to her ears and patting her vulva fervently with her bossy little hand,”BLOW!”

It is in these moments as parents, when you realize you have inadvertently taught your child the most perverted and inappropriate of behaviours, that we are humbled.   But we also realize that all we can do to change things it is to close our eyes, shake our heads, and hope to god it passes quickly...