Silence: a lost art

Our house is never quiet. Not only is Toby a loquacious child, he has also recently discovered that making a variety of alien like sounds intermingled with moronic laughter brings a smile to Mia’s face. He does it NON STOP. Sometimes I feel as though I am a broken record reciting the phrase, “Not so loud, Toby” and “That’s enough” over and over and over again.

I have TRIED to explain to him that Mia loves him and would find him funny EVEN IF he did away with his cacophonous sounds; I bet she would still flash her adoring smile his way if his volume was only half maximum and he didn’t add grotesque facial expressions to his already disturbing jingles.

This suggestion is usually met with a roll of the eyes and an exasperated sigh, and then another loud eruption of vocal diarrhea. (Followed by a predictably obedient fit of laughter by the ever-obliging Mia.)

It’s a vicious circle. Until last week, however, when we kindly left Toby with his Grandparents for some “bonding time”.

For the first time in eons, I woke up to the lone squeals of a 6 month old.

I brushed my teeth to her soft cooing.

I sipped coffee while she spat her breakfast at me – quietly.

I rocked her to sleep with only the sounds of her mouth sucking the bottle and the squeak of the rocking chair in the background.

During nap-time I checked email and cleaned the house. In silence.

Soon enough I heard the first little peeps of a 6 month old waking up and excitedly greeted my darling daughter.

I was met with a scowl.

I picked her up and changed her bum, then got out her favourite toys and laid them all down in front of her before plopping myself down on the carpet to enjoy a little one on one time with my her.

She was not amused.

Ten minutes later we were BOTH bored and slightly unsure of what to do with one another. The silence in the house was deafening.

I racked my brains trying to think of something I could do to bring a smile out of my usually cheerful daughter. After a number of unsuccessful attempts, the solution became obvious.

I glanced around to ensure that no one was looking before I put my fingers in either side of my mouth, scowled at her, bulged my eyes and puffed out my cheeks and then, as loudly as I could, shrieked with laughter while clicking my tongue against my teeth.

True to form, Mia smiled.